Do not freak out – the big scare is still coming!
Parents today jump at the slightest sign of their children’s unhappy emotions.
The following transpired in my kitchen one day: My two-year-old palm-rose (with some strong cactus traits) managed to get her hands on a tub of ice-cream. I know that her dad will shuffle tiredly out of his workshop one night in the hopes that his “refreshment” is still waiting for him in the freezer. I therefore had to confiscate the tub after she already had about four spoons full … it is not easy to stop a two-year-old eating ice-cream … but, determined to place my marriage above my child’s appetite, I firmly took it from her.
Yes, the tears rolled and “NO, MOMMY!” was continuously repeated, but I remembered my own advice: Stay calm (body, voice, face); speak like a broken record “Daddy’s ice cream, Daddy’s ice cream” and focus her attention on something else …
You probably think I could have allowed her the treat and bought a new tub of ice-cream for dad. You might feel that it was cruel to take the tub from her. But, you know, the screaming and the tears, as “scary” as they were, are a small foretaste of many more serious tests. Tests for which I am preparing my precious daughter right now while she is young. Can she make peace with letting go of the half-eaten ice cream tub? Then there is the chance that, one day, she’ll be able to put out a half-smoked cigarette; that she’ll be able to stand up and walk out halfway through a “bad” movie; having undressed halfway she’ll be able to put her clothes back on …
Am I scaring you?
Yes, self-control comes with practice, not age.